Friday, January 11, 2008

Secrets and Bombshells

And again, these famous, overused words: I've been thinking a lot.

Today i feel like I don't handle things well. I would almost dare to use the word "Scared" when talking about social situations.

I wrote a comic once about a friend of mine and I. This friend ran away from me and just disappeared so i drew a coming about the "Friendship gremlin" who went about day-to-day destroying friendships. The friendship gremlin also controlled a series of switches that determined one's disposition.

Right now i feel like the friendship gremlin has switched all my switches to "berserk" and i don't know how to handle myself.

Thus, this is what I have determined:

1. I shall keep secrets
2. I shall record my secrets in a place that is my own
3. I shant put myself out there too much for anyone or anything becuase;
4. When i get emotionally involved, it (whether a situation, or relationship or what have you,) explodes.

I was talking with a friend of mine and i said to this friend, "Friend, i am an atomic bomb!" And this is how i truly feel. What i touch is usually destroyed somehow. Tis a curse. A curse that leaves me feeling guilty, damaging and always asking for forgiveness.

I really am sorry and i don't mean to do it. I just can't stand to waste time or see unhappiness and when those things happen i'm so very easily frustrated.

Secrets secrets are so fun
Secrets are for me!

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